Low On Expectations ~ High On Hopes

Mar 11, 2020

I am the first person to admit that I’ve got some pretty high expectations when it comes to certain areas of my life. For anyone who knows me, you know….the longer the run – the better! The bigger the idea – the more I am interested! The more challenging a project or task – the more excited I become about it! Oh, and if we’re talking about sport races – let’s put ALL of this together! The longer, the bigger and more challenging the race – the faster I will squeal a very exuberant “yyyyyeeessssss”!

And this is all great. When talking about inanimate objects. Things. Ideas. Adventures. Goals. And dreams.

But I am learning that the opposite is true when it comes to people (including myself).

When it comes to people, I’m noticing that if I expect less and hope more, life becomes easier and I become happier. Doing so also makes me feel more at peace inside myself, less stressed, more joyful (and joy-filled) on a moment-to-moment basis and ultimately, everything just feels easier. Easier and possible. It’s true – Everything becomes possible when I lower my expectations and raise my hopes.

It feels like putting sun glasses on that makes everything you are looking at brighter! And when things are brighter, awe and wonder seep in to every day. And the little things become big things.

And that feels good! Very, very good.

I find myself appreciating the little moments a lot more. Like watching a sunrise or a sunset. Or when I noticed the full moon setting as the sun begins to rise just the other day. How cool is that? You gotta get up early though!

Small gestures of kindness mean so much more than the $5 they cost, like these goodies left in my hotel room along with a lovely note from the front desk today.

If we can turn down the dial on expectations and turn it up (way up) on hope, conversations will go better. All of our relationships will thrive. Work will be easier. Stress will be lowered. Health will improve. And so much more.

All this, compared to the trainwreck that happens in my life when my expectations are too high or too specific or when things simply don’t happen as I expect them to.

Where the heck is that dial?

It’s not that I don’t have expectations. I still do. But I am just trying to make those expectations more realistic. More achievable. And when it comes to other people, lowering my expectations and raising my hopes makes everything better. I don’t even know how to explain it. Just trust me on this one. And try it for yourself.

What would happen if we lowered our expectations a little? Just a little? Or maybe a lot?
I’m certain that a sense of awe and wonder would seep in to our every day…and every moment of our every day.

I learned a new word that talks about this concept: “Shoshin”.  It means, “The practise of seeing life with awe, wonder, curiosity and humility.”

If you appreciate this concept as much as I do and would like a little reminder of it to put on a keychain or necklace, check out the inspirational rings I’ve created:

https://crystalflaman.com/shop/silver-rings/

How would it feel if we were able to bring a little more shoshin to our life? I think we would automatically reduce expectations, increase hope and probably feel a whole lot better! Let’s try it – together!

Crystal Flaman is an international keynote speaker and social entrepreneur, inspiring you to discover your dreams and the difference you can create in the world. Anything is possible. Everything is possible. Believe in your dreams. Do what you love and be fearlessly you.