For the women who are trying to do and be everything for everyone.

I watch you trying in vain to please everyone but yourself.

I see you bending over backwards, wrought and weary with stress, contorting your being into impossible shapes in an attempt to do everything. To be everything, so perfectly. And then suffering silently because of it.

I watch you race to keep up with expectations, judgments and demands, most of which are created and contained in your own mind. Self-imposed and self-inflicted.

I ask you, the woman I see—how are you, really?

Is this unfulfilled existence how your life is meant to be lived? To be experienced? To be remembered?

Trying so hard leaves only destruction, self-destruction. And a bucket full of moments missed out on, filled with countless unrealized dreams.

It’s not supposed to be like this. Life is not meant to be a pail full of regret and resentment.

To the woman I see, this is my wish for you:

A heart overflowing with joy; a mind filled with cherished memories. Love endlessly given and received. Dreams realized. An abundance of enough of whatever you need. Spontaneity. Joy. Laughter. Happiness.

Most of all, I wish you self-acceptance and inner peace.

You are not alone. Every woman knows what you are going through. An unquenchable thirst to feel good enough. A hunger that comes from deep within our gut to feel worthy, smart, sexy, skinny, secure, loved. Or whatever we are starving for.

We have either been there or still are. We have all experienced this thirst, this hunger, and the desperate attempts to satisfy our own demands and expectations.

To do everything.

To be everything.

We do this because we have lost ourselves. We have forgotten who we are.

Could today be the day to do ourselves a much-needed favor?

To take a moment to find ourselves again?

To remember who we are?

Please say yes.

Put yourself first for once. Even for a moment. This moment.

To the woman I see, I ask you:

What do you need? What do you want? What would serve you? What would be best for you?

Right here, right now?

Do that. Be that—even for a moment.

And in this moment of just being, remember the one thing that we all have forgotten at some point in our lives.

You are enough, exactly as you are. You are so much more than enough—you just forgot.

Stop trying so hard and watch what happens.

In this moment of pause, allow yourself to remember who you are. What you want. What your dreams are. What you’re worth.

What is the worst that could happen if you just stopped? Stopped trying to make everything perfect? Stopped feeling so insecure? Stopped the story you play inside your head?

What if you just stopped?

What if you didn’t try so hard and just let the rest of the world be? Be disappointed. Be upset.

What if we allowed the world to be whatever it wanted to be, and surrendered to that outcome, regardless of what it was? What if we put ourselves first for this one moment.

What if the world around you, including your children, your partner, your boss and even your pets or plants, surprised you with their response? What if they were happy, overjoyed, completely grateful? What if they grew taller (even the plants), because you finally put yourself first?

Because you finally stopped trying so hard to do everything, to be everything—remembering that you are already everything. And always have been.

What if today was that day? And this was your moment?

What if?

This is for you: the woman I see every day, in the mirror.

And for the woman you see staring back at you, eyes filled with vulnerability and hope.

Do yourself a favor and stop trying so hard. To do everything. To be everything. And just let it all go.

You are enough in every way. You are good enough. Strong enough. Sexy enough. Smart enough. Brave enough. Brilliant enough.

Pause for just a moment to put yourself first, to remember. To catch a glimpse of your radiant magnificence.

Today is that day and this is your moment.

Rave Reviews

“All I can say is WOW! Crystal Flaman you were on fire at the recent Vernon Women in Business Leadership Conference. Your ability to tie the conference theme into your inspirational messaging. You had the entire room captivated with the interactive activities you brought to help solidify your messages. As the MC, it is my job to mind the room and the time slot. Your expert storytelling had us all captivated from beginning to end. Thank you! I would highly recommend you for any event where the group is looking to elevate their team and individual performances.”
Faith Wood, Inspiring Minds Consulting Ltd, Owner
“Crystal was invited to kick-off and set the tone for our Professional Development conference. She delivered an interesting and engaging presentation, and inspired us through her passion and leadership, focusing on creating significance in our successes. Feedback after the session was incredibly positive, appreciating the relevance to both work and home life. Crystal even left us with parting gifts – a crystal prism and rings with encouraging words on them…and I still have them hanging at my desk as a reminder of what she taught us.  I would highly recommend Crystal to speak at your next engagement if you’re looking for a moving, honest and successful woman to ignite passion and inspiration for your team.”
Caren Leinwant, Green Shield Canada, Individual Business Services Manager
“I have known and worked with Crystal for the past 20 years.  She is an amazing person!  Crystal is a great speaker – engaging, humourous, and has the ability to appeal to many different audiences – young and old.   She is always prepared and willing to be flexible depending on the needs of her clients.  She has worked with many start up businesses over the years to provide information and guidance.   I would not hesitate to hire or refer Crystal for any speaking, mentoring or coaching opportunities for businesses in my community.  I know you won’t be disappointed.”
Wendy McCulloch, Community Futures Boundary, General Manager
“Crystal is creative, innovative, passionate, and inspirational. She planned special, memorable, and meaningful activities for our students that helped them to recognize their talents, boost their self-esteem, and prepare them for their transition to middle school. Both staff and students were so impressed by Crystal. The students were excited about the gifts they received and these special tokens will forever remind them of the lessons learned during their time with Crystal.  It truly was an honour to work with Crystal and experience all that she has to teach and offer. Our students are better, more confident people because of the time spent with Crystal.”
Mrs Lara Davies, Teacher, North Glenmore Elementary School
“Her physical and mental strength is only matched by the kindness of her heart. Crystal Flaman is a talented entrepreneur and athlete who has combined her passion for humanity with sport. Every opportunity is used to promote the well-being of her fellow man whether it be at home or abroad. A gifted speaker who can inspire you to tears, or better yet action, uses her magnetic energy to promote positive change. Crystal is hard working, committed and her tenacity is evident in many of her successful projects. Working with Crystal will be one of the best decisions you have ever made. “
Laura Thurnheer, Associate Dean, Okanagan College
“The Diva retreat was the most amazing week of my year. I am new to yoga, so was worried I wouldn’t be able to keep up but Amelie was an amazing instructor and paced the class to include all abilities. It was a beautiful way to start the day! Crystal guided the workshops in her bright and positive way. Each day we meet for a workshop in a safe and supportive environment, with great materials to take away. She created a warm and welcoming place to talk and share experiences. The group of ladies – new to me – became friends I am still in contact with.  We each were able to laugh, share and feel validated.

The location was gorgeous and we had ample free time to explore the village, head to the beach or hang out at the resort. I loved the balance of yoga, workshops and free time.

I would highly recommend the retreat to give yourself time to pause, reflect and refocus.”
Dianne Bondaroff, DIVA Retreat 2018 participant, Artist, Entrepreneur, Change Maker
“I have known Crystal for over 15 years as a colleague and good friend. She is a key component of the instruction team for the Leisure Development Course, a unique three-year professional development program for parks, recreation and community development personnel. Crystal’s presentations are always inspirational, sensitive, insightful and tailored to the needs of the respective students. She is one of the most passionate and enthusiastic individuals I have had the pleasure of working with and would not hesitate in recommending Crystal for whatever endeavor she wishes to undertake.”
Chris Nelson, Coordinator, Leisure Development Course
“I am not sure how to compact my gratitude for what DIVA Retreats really has done for me. My first DIVA Retreat was in 2014. I was seeking exactly what it stands for: Discover my Inner Voice and Adventure through body,  mind, and spirit. I was so blessed to have spent the week with such amazing women and it was the start of a great personal journey since then. My second experience in 2018 was equally amazing and an opportunity to hold the space for someone else’s transformation experience.  At the same time, in the end I was newly inspired again!  I wanted to give back and, instead, got so much more in return. I recommend this retreat for anyone. You are safe and instantly welcomed if you come alone or bring your BFF's. I loved it all! Yoga, laughing, learning, hiking, biking, creating, trying healthy foods, humanitarian contribution.... and most of all making connections with amazing women from all over Canada.  I don’t think there is another retreat like this anywhere that is this affordable.
Louise Sarauer, Administrative Professional, Saskatoon, SK
“I have known Crystal for over 10 years and in that time I have had the pleasure of being a participant in her workshops and presentations as well as being a fellow presenter. Her unwavering enthusiasm for her topics and her sincere, heartfelt messages for her participants, makes her presentations exciting and meaningful to her audiences. She uses her own life challenges and successes as the back-drop for her messages allowing her to use humour to engage and connect with those in the room. Often using a variety of props and techniques, participants are continuously engaged in her presentations. As a result, Crystal is an effective speaker, focused on sharing her passion and beliefs to motivate participants to take action in their own lives, towards their goals and aspirations.”
Deb Comfort, Facilities Supervisor, Dept. of Recreation, Parks and Culture, Red Deer, AB

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